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Trying to have a conversation with my aunt anymore is like trying to talk with a possessed Sigourney Weaver in GHOSTBUSTERS. “There is no JoAnn, only cancer.” Here’s a few fun things we talked about at hospice today!

ME: *not saying anything, just minding my own business and working*
HER: FRANKIE WILL JUST YOU SHUT THE HELL UP?

HER: *incoherent rambling*
ME: Can you repeat that? I didn’t hear you.
HER: FRANKIE IS GOING TO BLOW UP.

ME: What’s the matter?
HER: Frankie did something.
ME: What did Frankie do?
HER: *incoherent rambling*
ME: Did Frankie do something good? Or did Frankie do something bad?
HER: BAD.
ME: What did Frankie do bad?
HER: EVERYTHING.

ME: OK. I’m going to go home now. I’ll see you tomorrow. Love you.
HER: *incoherent rambling*
ME: What was that?
HER: GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE.
ME: …
ME: I– OK. I’m going. I love you.
HER: …
ME: I love you.
HER: …
ME: I love you. Do you love me?
HER: NO.

(Hey! This was my 300th post on this blog! Woo! I’m going to go drink to forget now.)

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I had this dream where I lost my pup, Chloe Godzilla Cvetkovic, in large pack of other, almost identical-looking beagles. I searched and I searched by, try as I might, I just couldn’t seem to spot my pup.*

So, instead of trying to search through them all, dog by dog, I decided to think smarter not harder and have the entire pack perform a series of very specific tricks. First, sit. Then, lay down. Roll over. Sit up. Give paw. Speak.

And while all the dogs were sitting and rolling over and giving paw, I quickly spotted the one pup who was instead completely ignoring me and busy sticking her entire head into one of my slippers, with a great big stupid moron puppy grin on her face.

And that’s how I found my Chloe again. : )

*The beginning part of this dream is almost identical to a reoccurring nightmare I used to have when I was a child, where I lost my Pop Pop in a large group of men who all looked just like my Pop Pop, but I couldn’t seem to find the Pop Pop that was mine. I would wake up crying and make my parents call my Pop Pop, just to make sure that he was still there.

Hey kids,

So I bought and read the latest issue of AMELIA COLE AND THE UNKNOWN WORLD today, a comic I have recommended before, and found an awesome little Easter Egg at the bottom of page 16.

Yep, Officer Freeman is pickin’ up cold, refreshing six-pack of Patrick’s Punch-Up Brew! LOL!

Issue number four¬† of AMELIA COLE is out now and is written by Eisner and Harvey award winners Adam P. Knave & D.J. Kirkbride, drawn by Nick Brokenshire, and lettered by Rachel Deering. And, as if you needed another reason to be reading this book, all November proceeds of AMELIA COLE — and other MonkeyBrain titles — are being donated to the Hero Initiative! So read some awesome comics and help out a worthy cause!