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Hey Kids,

I need a little bit of help and, unfortunately, when I ask for help, that usually means that you’re gonna have to do some reading.

Reading? On a Saturday? (Or Sunday. Tuesday. Whichever day you happen to come across this post.) Oh nooooooooooes!

Don’t worry, he said setting the trap. It won’t be that bad. It’s only four pages long and, if you finish reading it and give me some feedback, there may even be a reward* in it for ya.

*EDITOR’S NOTE: Reward in question may be the satisfaction of knowing that you helped out your fellow man in a time of need. Reward may also include being called upon the next time the author requires the reading of his work. Void where prohibited. No purchase necessary.

Last year, I wrote a short story – based off of some childhood trauma – called
A Letter To Myself At Age Nine, Urging Myself Not To Let Our Mother Cut Our Hair Right Before The Start Of The 3rd Grade.

Anyway, I’ve been considering submitting it to This American Life and, honestly, I’m not too sure if it’s good enough. I know it has some problems but I think that, with a little time and effort, I could spruce is up a bit and make it submission-ready.

So do me a favor and take a look at the piece, give a read or two, and let me know what you think. Don’t be afraid to tell me if it sucks, just tell me why it sucks so I can fix it and make it less sucky.

And, if you’re a fan of This American Life, even better. Let me know if you could honestly see this thing in their catalog or not.

I know reading isn’t fun, especially when you’re reading my work – wakka wakka – but I really do appreciate the time and effort you’re spending to help me fix up my stories.

That said, GET TO WORK, MONKEYS!!!


Photos from the Summer of ’09 right here. Check ’em out. You might even see a picture of yourself up there.

Probably not, though.